Around two decades ago, I discovered Daniel Seibert's website and decided to purchase Salvinorin A from him. Smoking 1mg of this substance, equivalent to a grain of salt, is a challenge due to its propensity to be blown away by the slightest puff of air. To work around this, I added a single drop of water before vaporizing it.
Next thing I know, and saying "I know" actually lost meaning. Initially there was no time and space. The "initially" not longer made sense and "making sense" not longer made sense. The idea of no time or space always sounded beautifully philosophical, but when there is no time and space, there is nothing , at least nothing that we can describe. Without time or space, there is no judgment. It takes time to have judgement, with no time, one can not judge. Now that may sound beautiful but it is horrifying. When consciousness wants to understand, want to evaluate, wants to judge, but can not because there is not time, it's horrifying. There is no mind saying let go, just breath, there is no breath. I always had difficulty describing the experience. I wish I still had my efforts but alas I think they are gone. I posted them on tribe.net which alas is long gone. I had put this experience in the back of my mind. I can't say I forgot it. I will never forget it. It was the most shattering experience in my existence.
While this might sound intriguing, even beautiful on the surface, the actual experience was unnerving, deeply unsettling. The absence of all familiar reference points was not a liberating experience, but rather a horrifying one. Articulating the essence of this experience has always been a struggle for me, the inadequacy of language in capturing the full breadth and depth of it is painfully apparent.
Regrettably, my initial attempts to detail this experience, which were posted on tribe.net, have been lost to time. However, this experience has never truly faded from my memory. I cannot say I've forgotten it, for it is unforgettable, a significant and shattering milestone in my journey of existence.
On a recent Saturday, I stumbled upon a remarkably articulate description of this kind of transcendent experience.
This person is refreshingly articulate : https://twitter.com/alieninsect
Daniel Seibert's "reality was torn apart, obliterated in a second, it was horrifying experience"
What can truly unsettle one about the depths of salvinorin space is its sheer existential totality. It's as if this space has been the only reality, forever. Every memory, every tether to your humanity, vanishes from your awareness. It's eradicated completely. You have no recollection of consuming any substance. Nothing familiar has followed you here. You've seemingly always existed in this space, and the concept of forever dwelling here is harrowing. The absence of a lifeline back to what we know as reality can be a deeply terrifying thought.
For the following, I haven't watch this yet, but found this while putting together this post. Gwyllm has been a neighbor, friend, and elder sage for me over the last couple decades
It is structurally distinct from other naturally occurring hallucinogens (such as DMT, psilocybin, and mescaline) because it contains no nitrogen atoms; hence, it is not an alkaloid (and cannot be rendered as a salt), but rather is a terpenoid.[2
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